ED
AND HIS DEAD MOTHER
- 1993 - Director: Jonathan Wacks
Steve Buscemi
(Fargo) stars as "Ed", the owner of a hardware store who really
misses his mother. He misses her so much that when a stranger
from the "Happy People Ltd." (John Glover) offers to reanimate
her for a fee, he decides to go ahead. Yes, this sounds insane,
and it is. Only Ed's Uncle Benny (Ned Beatty) thinks this the
whole situation is completely wrong. Ed learns how right he is
when Mother starts acting a little "strange"... like developing
an appetite for dogs. This role is custom-made for Buscemi,
who has made a career out of playing strange rolls. The dry wit
in this one is not for everyone and the sarcasm is about as extreme
as it comes. You never really know a lot of the details, or how
exactly the reanimation process works, other than you need to feed the
reanimated person bugs, but it's really not necessary. The writing
is superb and the actors are all brilliantly cast. Beatty is at
his absolute best here. If you like dark, sick humor borderlining
on horror, you'll enjoy this film immensely.
FEAR FACTOR:
3 - STUPID VICTIM SCALE: 5 - SFX: 4 |
ELVIRA,
MISTRESS OF THE DARK - 1988 - Director: James Signorelli
Not a lot
of scares, but a crypt-load of cheesy lines in Elvira's Big Screen Debut.
The humor is along the lines of "Earnest Goes To Camp" but
there's TWO major differences... think about it. You get to see
a lot of Elvira, I missed most of the dialogue waiting for her to spill
out of that low-cut black dress. In reality, the movie is so silly
it's harmless and despite her killer body, Elvira is a living cartoon
character, so the family could actually watch this one without having
to explain too much to the kids. If you didn't know, Elvira's
real name is Cassandra Peterson, who, like it or not is one of the most
recognizable people in the Horror business, even if more of her work
is more comedic than scary. If you like your funny-bone stroked
with a campy delivery caked on thicker than Elivra's makeup, this movie
is perfect for you. Perhaps Elvira's greatest strengths is her
ability to laugh at herself... it's hard to criticize someone who make
so much fun of them self.
FEAR FACTOR:
7 - STUPID VICTIM SCALE: 2 - SFX: 9 |
Eternal
- 2004 - Director: Wilhelm Liebenberg/Federico Sanchez
"Eternal"
is an erotic tale of sex, seduction, murder and eternal life. Detective
Raymond Pope finds himself in the world of Eliabeth Kane, who may or
many not be the blood countess Elizabeth Bathory. There's an eerie and
sensual feel to this film that give you the creeps, or turns you on,
depending what you're into I suppose. The hero Raymond Pope is a flawed
character, and Conrad Pla plays with him with such an arrogance that
it's hard to root for him. This unfortunately takes some of the sting
out of the film. They way the story is told is interesting enough, and
the directors bring to life this underground world of sex and lust,
but the characters are all too unlikable for the film to be very effective.
The character of Elizabeth could have been explored much more than it
was. Fans of erotica or even David Lynch will find more to appreciate
here.
FEAR FACTOR: 4
- STUPID VICTIM SCALE: 2 - SFX: 5
|
EVENT
HORIZON - 1997
You'll find
this one under Science Fiction most of the time, but it's basically
a Horror film cast in space on the spaceship Event Horizon. The
cast is superb with Laurence Fishburne and Sam Neill in the main roles.
The story is set in the future as a crew is set off the find the lost
vessel. Sam Neill's character, "Dr. Weir", created the
ship and is part of this crew that find the Event, only something is
seriously wrong. If you wanted to simplify the plot you could
say it's a Haunted House in Space as the ship brings the crew face to
face with their nightmares. Everything you want from a good horror
is here, the effects, the blood, and some downright disturbing images.
This one jolted me a few times, especially when the find footage of
what happened to the old crew. If you like Sci-Fi and Horror,
this one has the best of both worlds.
FEAR FACTOR:
7 - STUPID VICTIM SCALE: 2 - SFX: 9 |
| THE
EVIL - 1978 - Director: Gus Trikonis
A year before
"Amityville Horor" came out, Richard Crenna starred in this
story about a haunted mansion. For the most part it's quite good
thanks to a capable cast that also includes Joanna Pettet and Andrew
Prine. A group of researchers led by Crenna end up getting trapped
in a mansion when Crenna accidently releases "The Evil" from
a vault in the basement. You'd think people would know better
than to open anything that could be mistaken for the "gateway to
hell". One by one they are killed off as they try to escape,
some of them die quite brutally. It's a good popcorn movie with
some scares and some unintentional laughable moments. The scene
with "The Devil" almost ruins the film, Satan (Victor Buono)
looks like "Boss Hogg" from "Dukes Of Hazard"...
wait, come to think of it, maybe that IS what Satan would look like,
a fat redeck with a cheap suit... not THAT'S scary.
FEAR FACTOR:
5 - STUPID VICTIM SCALE: 5 - SFX: 5 |
|
EVIL DEAD -
1982 - Directed/Written
by Sam Raimi - Produced
by Robert G. Tapert
Starring: Bruce Campbell, Ellen
Sandweiss, Hal Delrich, Betsy Baker, Sarah York.
This movie was made on a budget of $50,000 by Campbell & Raimi,
among others, who were high-school friends. Some of the initial
cast left before the movie was completed, so stand-ins were used.
Synopsis: A group of young college-age
friends, 2 men & 3 women, go to an old cabin in the woods for the
weekend. While there, they discover that an archeologist has discovered
and been translating a copy of The Necronomicon, which
contains spells for “demon resurrection”, among other things.
They naturally read the spells aloud, awakening the evil forces which
relentlessly pursue them throughout the film.
This
is a good movie and was the first of the trilogy I saw. Despite
a low budget, it has some real chills. The characters, especially
“Ash”, are engaging. The pace is fast, and something is happening
nearly all the time. If gore bothers you, you might want to pass
this one up. The characters, particularly Ash’s sister Cheryl,
display the usual inability to remain in a safe place—she goes wandering
in the dark woods looking for the source of a noise with the usual consequences.
As an aside, the
title of the book, The Necronomicon, is apparently an homage
to H. P. Lovecraft’s sinister book of the same name.
FEAR
FACTORr:
6. STUPID VICTIM
SCALE: 6
- REVIEW BY JOHN HARRIS |
| EVIL
DEAD 2 (Dead by Dawn)
- 1987 - Directed
by Sam Raimi, Produced by Robert Tapert.
Starring:
Bruce Campbell, Sarah Berry, Dan Hicks, Kassie DePaiva, Ted Raimi, Denise
Bixler, Richard Domeier.
This
movie is essentially a remake of Evil Dead 1; there are some minor plot
changes. Campbell’s “Ashley” takes his girlfriend to an old cabin
in the woods for the weekend, finds the book Necronomicon with
the same results as in the first movie. This movie is not
a sequel to E/D 1. There are enough changes to make this one equally
if not more entertaining than the original. Campbell has a lot
of fun, and so do we. We watch him cut his own hand off (it went
“bad”) after it nearly kills him. There is a very entertaining
sequence wherein he is pursuing and trying to kill it. Ash is
played as sort of a cynical anti-hero, quite capable of displaying terror,
screaming, and so on. He’s very tough, though, and essentially
good; he comes through in the end. You can’t help but like him.
Again, if gore bothers you, skip this one.
FEAR
FACTORr:
6. STUPID VICTIM
SCALE:
5 - REVIEW BY JOHN HARRIS |
THE
EXORCIST - 1973 - Director:
William Friedkin
Quite possibly
the most famous horror movie of all-time, or at least modern times.
This movie has been copied and lampooned more than any other Horror
film. Basically, anything that dealt with Possession was playing
off of The Exorcist. If you don't know already, the movie is based
around young Regan MacNeil (Linda Blair), the daughter of a famous actor,
who becomes possesed and her mother seeks out the help of a priest who
has recently been losing his faith in the Church. Anyone over
30 probably saw this movie as a child... and it most likely scared the
HELL out of them, litereally. Generation X will mostly likely
find the movie tedious and slow moving, which I would agree to a point.
I saw this as a teenager, and it did disturb me, but not as bad as I
thought it would. This may have had to do with the age and era
I saw the movie, plus the fact I saw many copycats before the original.
I will say this, some of the possession scenes are STILL disturbing.
It's common knowledge that in the movie Regan's head literally spins
around, which might seem comical now, but watch this again and it does
give you the willies. I've always contested that the ending was
too abrupt and anti-climatic, but others might claim this adds to the
overall darkness of the film. This is a masterpiece, there's no
doubt about that, slow or not, the overall feel of this movie is dripping
with evil. A must for anyone remotely serious about horror.
FEAR FACTOR:
8 - STUPID VICTIM SCALE: N/A - SFX: 6 |
THE
EXORCIST 2: The Heretic - 1977 - Director:
John Boorman
Imagine
what this movie had to live up to... Imagine what director John Boorman
(Deliverance) had to do to replicate the horror of the first movie.
A monumental task to say the least that falls way short of the first
film. It's four years later now and Regan MacNeil (Linda Blair)
is now a being studied on and "synchronizes" with Father Lamont
(Richard Burton). This movie, simply stated, is extremely confusing
and slow. The end isn't too bad, but it takes FOREVER to get there.
It's almost as if there were too many hands in the cookie jar and they
tried to do way to much and accomplished very little. Linda Blair
had filled out nicely, but had somehow lost her ability to act!
I'm not as hard as some critics on the movie as it was a good effort
by director Doorman as far as cinematography and imagery goes, it just
didn't all come together and was considerably less disturbing that part
one.
FEAR FACTOR:
5 - STUPID VICTIM SCALE: N/A - SFX: 7 |
EYES
WIDE SHUT - 1999 - Director: Stanley Kubrick
Stanley
Kubrick's last movie before his death was his first movie in over a
decade when he did the disturbing (Full Metal Jacket). This one
boasted the star power of Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman, who have since
gotten divorced... perhaps their relationship was more like the movie
than we thought. This one is a sexual odyssey of a married couple,
Cruise and Kidman, and takes you though their problems as a couple.
This is an extremely simple asssesment as Kubrick brings you into a
bizarre world of erotica and sexual deviance. Cruises character
finds himself tempted on all levels which leads him to a mansion and
a secret underground gathering of a sexual cult of sorts. This
one moves much slower than other Kubrick films like "The Shining",
and isn't really a Horror movie, but rather a disturbing film that really
seems to test your own moral values. You feel almost dirty at
times watching this, party because he taps into some taboo fantasies
that may have tempted us all at one time or another, certainly not to
this grand extent, but at some level. I don't highly reccomend
this one, although the more I've seen it the more it grows on me.
Kubrick could have cut this one down considerably and had an equally
troubling feel to it.
FEAR FACTOR:
8 - STUPID VICTIM SCALE: N/A - SFX: 6 |
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